Highlander: There Can Be Only One!
We got tired of having randos in our studio, so this week, it’s just your beloved Darth and Jason at the helm of this 80s classic that also poses as a complete train wreck. It’s not often that a movie offers up wrestler strip-teases AND immortal blue jean sex, but Jason selected a film that provides them both. Get excited.
We can’t decide if Clancy Brown
or Tim Curry
chews more scenery when they go off the improvising rails. To be fair, Clancy Brown
may take home the belt when it comes to nearly murdering
fellow actors, but this makes sense if you caught his performance on Rick
and Morty.
Christopher
Lambert was also in this movie at some point, but the real star of the film
was his utterly indecipherable
accent; in fact, it might be even more nonsensical than the background of
his “Egyptian”
mentor.
Apparently, we can blame Argentina (goodbye to yet another
country) and Highlander
fans themselves for the poor quality of Highlander
sequels. Ultimately, Jason applies the same sense of denial to the sequels
that Darth uses for Spider-Man 3. Regardless, this franchise may stand alone as
the only one to ever be improved by a subsequent television series.
None of this really matters in a film where logic slices
through the plot like car battery sparks through a longsword. Honestly, in a
movie where quasi-Scottish Bruce Wayne cannot achieve mortal omnipotence until all
the immortals are dead, your suspension
of disbelief is key.
We’d be remiss, however, if we didn’t mention the most
timeless aspects of this beloved 80s film. Queen’s amazing music, Peter Diamond’s legendary
stunt training, and Sean
Connery’s mere 7-day presence help to solidify Highlander as an immortal
and treasured classic.
Our last piece of advice is this. Ladies, don’t make your
man light an annual candle. White Fang his ass and
die like a low-maintenance bawse.